triptoprofiling | 002 → {text} Violet City

I have been doing a lot of thinking lately. Mainly about the newcomers arriving in New Bark Town.

After the massive snowstorm that came in before the holidays, I think we can all agree there has to be a better contingency plan to get new arrivals the proper help they need to get by. Maybe there is a way we can get information out to them better. I'm open to suggestion but here is what I'm proposing:

A basic survival guide. We already have a guide outlining the wildlife here but nothing about basic wilderness survival. Under these conditions, having a sleeping bag is not enough to get by through the night.

To be honest, besides learning it from others, I do not know the first thing about surviving the outdoors. But I know there are others out there who do. If we all pool our resources together we can make something that will save any newcomer a whole lot of grief.

Now I'm willing to compile the information together. All I need is a little help with the legwork here so to speak. Here are a few items to give everyone an idea:

1.) Weathering your campsite
2.) Building a fire from scratch
3.) Geo-navigation
4.) Notable Wild Pokémon Dangers
5.) Storm/Severe Weather Preparation

Now I may have unintentionally left some subjects out. But if this is something you're interested in then send me a message.

[For those of you who are messaging Jayden via video be prepared to see a man all scratched up in the face from his new baby shiny Torchic he got for Christmas. Who knew baby fire chickens like to play peck the shit out of Jayden's face as soon as it hatches? So far the winning nickname for this little guy is SHOO!

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

_{[You think it's bad seeing it in text, imagine having to HEAR IT when some poor bastard accidentally broadcasts it in the middle of the night. IT'S HAPPENED BEFORE. SHE REMEMBERS.]}

well okay, if you say so

but i think it loses a little impact in translation

Edited 2013-01-09 04:29 (UTC)

[N O P E

DON'T WANT TO KNOW. YOU STAHP THIS MUDBUTT HEAPASHIT RIGHT NOW.]

I'm pretty sure the general public could go without the grim details.

_{[TOILET HUMOR IS FUNNY AND YOU KNOW IT, MR. STUCK-UP FBI.]}

in my experience, it's the grim details that make people read

you know, like a train wreck you can't look away from

_{[Except with butts.]}

[DAMMIT HEATHER HE'S AN AGENT, NOT BROWNIE THE LOOSE BOWELS PREVENTION BEAR.]

How about we stick with:

WARNING: MAY CAUSE SEVERE ABDOMINAL PAINS & DIARRHEA

It's short and to the point.

Edited 2013-01-09 05:57 (UTC)

_{[DON'T MAKE HER COME UP WITH VARIOUS BATHROOM-RELATED WORDS FOR 'F.B.I.' TO STAND FOR.]}

well okay I GUESS as long as it's in big red font it'll probably work

[Fudge Brown Icicles huehehehe everyone's a goddamn jokestuh']

If you're that concerned, I will add a small description to it. I'm no doctor but I will figure something out to get the message across as clearly as possible.

_{[Or 'Fecal Butt Investigations'. DON'T TEMPT.]}

okay it's a deal

hopefully it'll save a whole lot of people from berry-related butt meltdowns in the future

I have a feeling they won't say it but in their heads- they are thanking somebody for the intervention.

May I get your name please?

name's Heather Mason

no need to credit me specifically with the toilet-related stuff though I don't mind sharing the glory

Wasn't planning on it. It's just having a name helps when I have to sort through all of these messages again.

But I think I had enough glory for today, thanks.

002 → {text} Violet City

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